By Erika Fehrenbach Prell It all starts out with the best intentions. You know you need to...lose weight, exercise more, drink more water, volunteer, read...whatever you know deep down you should do or need to do to be the best version of yourself. You start making a plan; you pick a start date. You start your new behavior, and all goes well for a few days and then you stop. You start to beat yourself up but then come to the conclusion it just wasn’t the right time to start! That’s it...phew, off the hook. Or, maybe you never started because you already knew it wasn’t the right time to start..it’s too busy, it’s fall, Mercury is in retrograde. It’s okay, you tell yourself. I know I should do it, and I have a plan, I just need the right time. Sound familiar? Anyone? Bueller? (Please let there be someone else out there that got that last one and thinks it is as funny as me!) Truth bomb time! Are you sitting down? This might be hard to take...there will NEVER be the perfect to start something new. This is not a free pass to stay where you are; because, remember, if you want something new or different, you have to do something new and different. As Henry Ford so wisely coined, “if you keep doing what you have always done, you will keep getting what you've always gotten" holds true. I am here to shed a light on possibly the place you get stuck...getting started. It’s not entirely your fault on not being able to start. Your brain likes habits and routines; in fact, your brain is designed to create no-brainer reactions to common behaviors to save time and energy so that you can focus on other things. Whenever you try to change one of these no-brainers, it wakes your brain up from automatic to paying attention; this is getting you out of your comfort zone, even with something as small as choosing water to drink at lunch instead of your usual soda. And, because it’s new and different and not part of the usual, your brain resists. Sure, you might go along with it for awhile, mostly due to willpower. But, willpower only lasts for so long. And, if you haven’t put in the proper work on your mindset, your brain will push you back to your no-brainer habits and routines. And, your brain will help you rationalize it. That little inner voice will chime in with things like, “you are too busy right now”, “the holidays are coming”, “once this season is over it will be the perfect time”, “this will be a great New Year’s resolution”. This makes you feel better about not starting; you will probably fail anyway if it’s not the right time, right? I get it. You are busy; you have a lot going on. But, ask yourself, will this ever change? Will all these reasons not to start ever go away? I’m willing to bet you will exchange one season of busy for another, which means, you will never get started. It’s not entirely your fault on not being able to start. Your brain likes habits and routines; in fact, your brain is designed to create no-brainer reactions to common behaviors to save time and energy so that you can focus on other things. Whenever you try to change one of these no-brainers, it wakes your brain up from automatic to paying attention; this is getting you out of your comfort zone, even with something as small as choosing water to drink at lunch instead of your usual soda. And, because it’s new and different and not part of the usual, your brain resists. Sure, you might go along with it for awhile, mostly due to willpower. But, willpower only lasts for so long. And, if you haven’t put in the proper work on your mindset, your brain will push you back to your no-brainer habits and routines. And, your brain will help you rationalize it. That little inner voice will chime in with things like, “you are too busy right now”, “the holidays are coming”, “once this season is over it will be the perfect time”, “this will be a great New Year’s resolution”. This makes you feel better about not starting; you will probably fail anyway if it’s not the right time, right? I get it. You are busy; you have a lot going on. But, ask yourself, will this ever change? Will all these reasons not to start ever go away? I’m willing to bet you will exchange one season of busy for another, which means, you will never get started. To further shift your mindset as well as your belief, pick a mantra or affirmation to repeat to yourself multiple times daily that is in alignment with what you are working towards. For example, if your goal is to be healthy, it could be as simple as, “I am a healthy person” or “I am becoming my healthiest self”. Shifting your mindset and belief are critical to the success in changing a behavior. Now, brainstorm any roadblocks that you anticipate getting in your way as well as a strategy to deal with them. The last step is to map out a plan. Give your plan action steps that you can hit; it’s best to start small and work your way up as these changes become your new no-brainers. For example, a baby step to getting healthy is drinking more water. You can start by drinking a glass of water with each meal, then substituting a soda or coffee for a glass of water, then increasing the amount of water to the ultimate goal of half of your body weight daily. Doing this over the course of several weeks is not as much of a shock to the system as stopping all beverages except water and drinking half your body weight daily on day one. Celebrate your progress and success often. I promised the perfect time to start something new. While the perfect time does not exist, the right time does. When is the right time? The right time, my dream chasing friends, is now. Just start. You may never be exactly ready, and, spoiler, you might fail. But, getting started ANYWAY gets your closer to where you want to be than waiting for the perfect time ever will.
Shine On!
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AuthorsJackie White has been writing about life and its ups and downs for many years. With a degree in Industrial Psychology and a life-long student of personal development she is intrigued by how each individual chooses to live their life. Jackie feels strongly that truly living your best life is imperative to attaining peace and fulfillment. SoulShine was borne of her desire to inspire and teach others to live their best life. This is her mission and her dream. Archives
February 2022
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