It’s Not You, It’s Me:Breaking Up With Those Holiday Traditions You Secretly Hate

By Erika Fehrenbach Prell

Whoa...it’s November. Seriously, how did that happen?!? Halloween, however it manifested in your life this year, is over, and what does that mean? Christmas preparation is in full swing. It always amazes me how fast the turnover is...candy and pumpkins one day, LED trees and Santa the next. And, perhaps, the obligatory section featuring Tom the Turkey for Thanksgiving. With the holiday season comes another thing or things or many, many things. 

No, not stress, indigestion and headache. (I mean, that might come as well...don’t worry, we will help you calm that chaos, too.) I am talking about traditions...all those things that you do every year to celebrate the season. Decking the halls, inside and out. Getting the tree and decorating it. Black Friday shopping with your crazy aunts. Baking cookies. Caroling. The work parties. Shopping and wrapping, then shopping some more. Traveling to this relative and that relative and the other relative. The Elf on the (frickin’) Shelf...

The list of traditions goes on and on and on. My stress level is going up just reading this, and half of these aren’t even things we do!

Stop a minute. Take a deep, cleansing, calming breath. Reset that mindset and listen. I’m about to present you with the opportunity of a lifetime. Are you ready?!?

Under the guise of tradition, you may find that some of these have actually become obligations; things you really dread doing but feel you have to. Or, something that you started around the holidays because it seemed fun or you didn’t want your kids to miss out. (I know there are those that adore Elf on the Shelf but this is a very common parental trap that is often regretted once started, especially if you start getting more creative than just moving Elfie from place to place each night.) Have you found yourself thinking, “I wish we didn’t have to…..”, fill in the blank with whatever obligation, err, sorry, holiday tradition, that you inwardly can’t stand.

Enter a worldwide pandemic and an unexpected opportunity to save your holiday! You can use the pandemic as an excuse, err, opportunity, to break up with those traditions that don’t serve you!! Like…

-Elf on the Shelf...sorry, Santa has the Elves on quarantine!

-Traveling to your third-cousin-twice-removed house 4 hours away...so sorry, the pandemic!

-Black Friday shopping...oh, can’t social distance!

-Caroling in the freezing cold...masks interfere with my singing, I’m out!

Are you picking up what I’m putting down? Do you hear me cluckin’, big chicken? Are you smellin’ what I’m steppin’ in? Okay, I know I am being a little silly but silly is fun, and we all need more fun. (As a bonus, try out any of those phrases if you want a fantastic reaction from people.)

Here’s the honest truth about holidays. A big part of holiday stress is overcommitment, trying to pack too many things into too small of a time. All these things sneak up on you and compound over time. Because they are traditions, or at least events you have participated in a long time, you might feel terrible backing out or saying no, even if they only bring stress and not enjoyment to your holiday. This is your opportunity to take back your holiday, ditch the obligations, and redesign the season to bring you joy and peace, not stress and headache.

Time to Break Up With the Tradition Assessment:

1. Make a list. Write out all the traditions and obligations that you say yes to during the holiday season. Do not worry about if they will actually happen this year due to covid or not. Just write them down.
   
2. Grade them. Which of these bring you joy? Which ones do you secretly (or actively) hate? Which ones do you enjoy but creates a lot of stress to execute? 
   
3. Break up time. Seriously, do not miss this opportunity to finally cut the traditions and obligations that suck the life force out of your holiday. Ditch the stress and bring on the joy!
   

Let’s face it. Coronaville is going to change how our holidays unfold, even some of the things that bring you absolute joy may need modifications. This is an opportunity to save the traditions that you absolutely love and figure out how to still do them safely or replace them with something else. The Time to Break Up With the Tradition Assessment will uncover what needs to go, what needs to stay, and what is worth changing to fit with the times. This is your opportunity to take back your holiday and recreate it the way you want without judgement or interrogations - because it’s the pandemic (wink, wink). 

Don’t miss this opportunity of a lifetime! Shine on!